A bully pretends to be a victim in order to manipulate others.
Because most people are good and compassionate, this is bullying at its worst.
When a bully acts like a victim, they also gain the unwitting compliance of others into bullying you. Naïve, compassionate people will chastise you for not caring about the bully’s victimization, and not changing your behaviour to meet the bully’s desires.
Although this particularly nasty form of bullying occurs occasionally in the workplace, it is more common at home, where it represents emotional blackmail.
A bully can go as far as to change their appearance e.g. change their hair colour (more likely if their image is female), from dark to blonde to look vulnerable and making a concerted effort to smile sweetly in photographs to mask their true selves. See The Dark ‘Arte’ of Glamour
A bully exaggerates the impact of your actions on them
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